


A Thousand Pieces

by glorfindely



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Fluff, Light Bondage, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-20
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-23 16:01:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8333719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glorfindely/pseuds/glorfindely
Summary: When Hux discovers Kylo alone, in the midst of a panic attack, he finds himself caring, trying to comfort, and without wanting to admit to himself why, he keeps going back to Kylo afterwards.  Or: In which Hux and Kylo realize they both need and want each other.





	1. First Night

**Author's Note:**

> My first time actually writing like this, so i hope it's at least a little bit enjoyable! I havent gotten the hang of actually telling a story yet though so each chapter will mainly be from the time they spend together during the nights.  
> 

Kylo sank to the floor of the room he just trashed with his lightsaber. Again. It feels like the only way to get out any of his anger, but this time it’s something else, something worse, not just anger. He feels lost, and like he is falling apart into a thousand pieces. Pieces he won’t be able to pick up again. His mind feels like a typhoon of chaos, he can’t breathe. The world spinning. Luckily the crew of the ship always stays as far away from him as possible, especially when they hear him rampaging with his lightsaber. It would be humiliating if anyone saw him in this state, _weak_. Kylo hates to show weakness, merely because he is _not_ weak. But he always had an anger problem, ever since he was a child. That just makes people afraid of him though, and he quite enjoys that. He tries to stand up, his legs giving in and sending him back to the floor, his breath rasping in his throat. Even his vision is getting blurry now, and he is afraid he might faint. _Afraid._ The nightmares are also getting worse. He wakes up almost every night gasping for breath. Everything is getting worse, after that day on the bridge. It was supposed to complete his journey to the Dark Side, instead he feels like he is losing his mind. Maybe that is what its suppose to feel like. No. He should be feeling more powerful, not weakened like this, pitiful, crawling on the floor like a child, trying to catch a breath. “Ren?” Kylo hears a hard questioning voice. But all his senses feel scrambled and he can’t focus. _Hux?_ No one should see him like this. Especially not _General_ Hux, he would probably tell all about his stupid weaknesses to the Supreme Leader.

Kylo is still recovering from the fight with the girl in the forest, Hux offered to go check on him, he is not sure why, it’s not his job to look after this child of a man. He is not in his quarters and he therefore has to go looking for him, _typical,_  Kylo Ren being a bother. He finds him in a deserted part of the ship, Hux can imagine why its deserted. He is sitting against the wall of the room, heaving for breath and eyes wide open. If Hux didn’t know any better, he would think he looked frightened. “Ren?” He walks over to him slowly, not sure how to proceed, he looks like he is having some sort of panic attack, which is quite different from his regular anger-bursts. Hux crouches down next to Kylo, and carefully lays a hand on his shoulder. “Ren?” He says again, but this time softer, not sure why he even bothers. He feels Kylo twitching when he touches him, and he looks up at Hux, trying to focus his vision on him.

Slowly his eyes stop being blurry and he sees Hux’s face clearly, he has a weird look on his face. No, _concern_. Kylo wants to feel angry again, but it doesn’t come, probably because there is no room for anything more. Hux’s hand slowly moves across Kylo’s back, and he is now sitting next to him, suddenly nearly holding on to him, and Kylo feels his breath slowing, the pain in his chest fading, and even all the thunder and clouds in his head slowly start to fade. They sit like this for what feels like hours but is probably closer to 10 minutes, until Kylo is completely calm again, or as calm as he is able to feel. Hux then gets up and leaves Kylo alone, and after a while he leaves too, and goes back to his quarters. It’s getting late, and he feels very tired after that strange, pitiful ordeal. Although he doubts he will get much rest during the night. As usual.

Hux has also returned to his quarters, and keeps thinking about what just happened with Kylo. It annoys him, just the thought of having _comforted_ fucking Kylo Ren, apprentice of Snoke. And yet he is still thinking about it, thinking about Kylo. He is not unaccustomed to Kylo’s anger issues and continued trashing of his ship with that stupid lightsaber, but this was something entirely different. It looked like he was in severe pain, but not from his newely sustained wounds, more like wounds that had been building his entire life, but Hux didn’t really know that much of Kylo before he came to Starkiller Base. Should he check on him again? No, that’s ridiculous of course, why should he care? But Hux is already on his way out of his quarters again before he had even finished thinking it. Fuck. Why does he even bother? Kylo will probably just have another tantrum and force choke him for even talking to him.

Kylo had just started pulling off his robe when someone is at his door. Who the hell bothers him this late? But he feels who it is before he answers it. Shit, what does he want now? To humiliate Kylo some more? Great.

“What?” Kylo asks as annoyed as he possibly can.

“You didn’t look very good earlier, I thought I should check on you. You would probably not appreciate it if more people knew about it anyway, otherwise I would just send one of the medics to you. The Supreme Leader probably wants you in one piece.” Hux doesn’t really know what to say, he shouldn’t even be here. And most of all he should not care about this, and yet he still does, and that really just makes him want to punch himself in the face.

“Fine, come in, if you must. I was going to go to bed though, do you have to bother me now?” Kylo is feeling quite annoyed now, but there is still a part of him that wants Hux there. To watch over him. Isn't that just stupid.

“Yes I do, that _incident_ seemed pretty bad, I should probably watch over you for a while, just so you don’t hurt yourself while sleeping or something, that sounds like something you could do” Hux actually just wants to stay, but there is no way in hell he is going to say that out load, for Kylo to laugh at him.

“You’re going to _watch me sleep_? Seriously? Whatever, I’m too tired to argue right now.” Kylo scoffs at Hux, and turns back to his bed and continues undressing. He notices Hux looking away, he wouldn’t really care if he had kept looking at him though. He turns off the lights and gets into bed, Hux is still standing in the middle of the room. “There’s a chair. Sit in it if you’d like.” _Or you could lie next to me_.

Hux takes off his boots, his jacket and his hat, he could at least be a little bit comfortable, and sits down in the chair. At least it’s a fairly comfortable chair, although he doesn’t like the fact that he will probably sit in it all night. He should just go back to his own quarters and get a good night’s sleep instead of sitting here like a complete idiot, looking at another idiot sleep. He could just leave, there is nothing stopping him. And yet there still is.  

* * *

Hux wakes with a start, his neck hurting from sleeping in the chair. Did something wake him? Kylo? He looks over and finds him in what seems to be some sort of nightmare. He sounds distressed and keeps thrashing around in his bed. Hux hurries over, like it's completely natural for him to rush to Kylo’s side when he’s distressed. _Fool_.

He carefully climbs into the bed, but getting a hold of Kylo is not easy, he is bigger than Hux is. When he finally does he holds on tight until he stops moving, whispering in his ear “sshh, calm down, it’s not real, Ren”. He wakes up slightly, enough to turn around and face Hux, and presses into the embrace, face against Hux’s chest, where he can probably feel how fast and hard Hux’s heart is beating. _Ridiculous._ He feels Kylo smile against his chest. “What are you doing?” he says, Hux can hear the mocking tone of his voice. _Great._ “Hell if I know, but since you’re awake I think I should probably go”. _Please don’t make me go._

“No!” Kylo says a little too fast, not meaning to sound desperate. “Please stay, don’t move.” _Please._ Not a word he tends to use, not a word he likes to use. And yet he doesn’t mind right now, as long and Hux doesn’t move away from him. It’s been a long time since he woke up already calm after the nightmare, and apparently Hux did that. _Damn it._

They stay like this, neither moving, neither wanting to, not saying anything. Kylo keeps his face against Hux’s chest, listening to his heartbeat, the heat of Hux’s body transferring to Kylo’s, no space at all between them. He feels Hux’s hand going into his hair, sending chills down his spine. It’s almost enough to make him hard, but he restrains himself, not wanting this moment to change, not now. Kylo falls asleep again like this, pressed close to Hux’s body and his touch. He can’t remember the last time he slept so peacefully.

* * *

Kylo wakes up when he feels Hux slipping away from him. It’s probably morning, and Hux obviously needs to get to work. He slowly untangles from Kylo and gets out of the bed, Kylo stays in it not really wanting to move yet. He feels like he just lost a part of his body, and desperately wants it back, the heat and comfort of it.

“I should get to work.” Hux says quietly while he puts his clothes back on. “Should I…come back tonight?” He doesn’t look at Kylo when he says this either, he just stands with his back to him, placing his hat as perfectly as he can over his red hair.

 _Yes, I’d like that, I think I need that, need you. Your fingers in my hair and the feeling of your body against mine. Safety._ “Alright.” Is all Kylo answers.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux returns to Kylo's quarters, to stay another night.

It’s quite late before someone is at Kylo’s door again. He feels his heart start to beat faster, and quickly feels annoyed by it. He’s not sure why this is happening, and he really doesn’t like that, not knowing, feeling like he does not have control. But that seems to be normal these days, so why fight it, like he fights everything else.

Hux looks determined when he enters his quarters, but then again he is a very determined person, he probably often has that look on his face. There is, on the other hand, a very different look, or glow, in his bright green eyes, compared to the confused and annoyed look from last night.  He walks straight over to Kylo, puts his hands on the sides of his face and kisses him, right on the mouth. Kylo feels so surprised he is not sure how to respond to it. His first instinct is to push him away, but it gets washed away as his whole body suddenly relaxes and he leans into the kiss, responding by placing his hands in Hux’s hair, causing his hat to fall to the floor. It feels like they kiss for such a long time, at the same time as it ends too soon when they break apart, both looking flustered. “What…was that?” Kylo feels confused, heart beating faster than it should, and he just wants to put his hands back in Hux’s hair.

“It just…felt like something I had to do. Like I needed it, had needed it for a long time.”

Kylo just stares at him. He reaches his hand up to Hux’s face, and strokes the edge of his mouth with his thumb, Hux closing his eyes as he does so, slightly parting his lips.

“Are you going to watch me sleep again?” Kylo says, smirking at Hux as he opens his eyes again, looking uncertain. It’s a new look on him, Kylo quite likes it.

“You’re having trouble sleeping because of nightmares. I’m going to help you sleep.” Hux actually turns a bit red while saying this, it just makes Kylo smile more, also because there is a want in him. A want for Hux in his bed again. “Well come on then”, Kylo walks towards the bed, removing his robe and tunic on the way. Its already quite late, and his body still feels tired after the incident yesterday, although the exhaustion is not really physical, his head mostly feels tired all the time these days.

Kylo is not really sure how to proceed from here though, do they lie down and sleep? Or should he give into his want and grab a hold Hux, kiss him, touch him.

Hux watches as Kylo removes his clothes on his way to the bed, just like the night before, except this time Hux is going to undress along with him, and climb into the bed while they are both awake. Stripped down to his underwear Kylo climbs into bed, laying down on his side, waiting for Hux to join him. Hux doesn’t hesitate after he has taken off most of his own clothes. At first they just lie next to each other, both on their side, facing each other, but not too close, just looking at each other. After a while Hux can’t take it any longer and moves his hand into Kylo’s hair. He really likes how it feels in between his fingers, so surprisingly soft. Kylo closes his eyes when he feels the closeness of Hux, shifting a bit like he wants to move closer. “You’re too far away”, Hux says. _I want to feel you_. Kylo doesn’t seem to need to think about it, and moves as close as he possibly can, wrapping his arms around Hux, his face against Hux’s naked chest. Hux just keeps stroking Kylo’s hair, feeling sleepy from the comfort of having him close. They both fall asleep like this, wrapped around each other, the last thing Hux remembers is the feeling of Kylo’s lips on his chest.

* * *

Kylo wakes feeling confused, not even sure where he is. He feels Hux, still holding him tight to his body. _Hux_. That’s right, he slept here, and Kylo didn’t even wake during the night this time. He feels Hux stirring, and moves up slightly so their faces are level, so he can look at him. Hux slowly opens his eyes and looks back at him. Kylo feels like Hux can see right through him, through the invisible armour he surrounds himself with. It feels good, having someone he can let his guard down with, someone to be close with. Hux feels so good to Kylo, so good, like a cocoon he can wrap himself in that will protect him, mostly from himself.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There miiight be some smut soon;) This is getting too fluffy xD


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux and Kylo grow accustomed to spending the nights together, and eventually can't bear the thought of sleeping without the other at all. It has developed to something more than sleeping by now, and this particular night Hux brings something special for Kylo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided this is the last chapter for this fic! Im pretty sure im the most satisfied with this chapter though, even if i have no idea how to write smut xD

It’s become a normal thing now, for Hux to come to Kylo’s quarters and stay the night. Not every night, but as often as possible, getting so accustomed to sleeping in each other’s arms, not wanting to be without each other, both of them needing to feel the heat and closeness of the others body.

Even though it started out with them just needing to feel close to each other it didn’t take long before that wasn’t enough, and they both knew from early on that they both wanted more, needed more. Giving into this yearn for each other felt easy, so right, and filled with more pleasure than they had ever imagined.

* * *

Hux enters Kylo’s room in silence. Kylo just smirks and walks further into his quarters. Hux follows while pulling out from his coat something he brought with him.

“Ropes? For me? Oh, you shouldn’t have.” Kylo smiles, while removing Hux’s hat.

Hux pushes Kylo away from him and closer to the bed. He knows Kylo can easily get out of them no matter how tight he ties them, but he also knows he won’t try. For some reason, Kylo lets Hux be in control in this room, without question. Well, with some questions but that’s just Kylo being Kylo of course. But Kylo loves it, taking orders from Hux, feeling his control, but also because he knows how much Hux himself enjoys it.

Nobody can tell Kylo what to do, he always does exactly what he wants, unless it’s coming from Snoke of course. Hux immensely enjoys this, being able to have Kylo exactly as he wants him, preferably tied down, awaiting whatever Hux is going to do to him.  

He puts his hand on Kylo’s chest now, and pushes him onto the bed. _Good_.

“Now take off your clothes.” _The General is here._

“What, you’re not going to remove them for me?” Kylo almost sounds a bit disappointed

“No, I’m going to watch you remove them yourself.” Hux tries to hold back a smirk, fails. _Because I know that drives you crazy, having me right here without my hands on you._

Kylo starts to undress, Hux slowly moving closer as he does.

He takes off his jacket and his shoes, never taking his eyes off Kylo while doing so, and climbs onto the bed where Kylo is finally fully undressed. Hux forcefully pushes Kylo towards the back of the bed, places himself on top of him and lifts his arms backwards in order to tie them, Kylo smirking up at him all the while. They are sitting extremely close now, Hux feels Kylo’s breath on his neck, and feels him gasp in pleasure filled pain as Hux tightens the ropes as well as he can. He leans back from Kylo, so he can remove the rest of his own clothes, listening to Kylo’s already heavy breath, feeling him hardening from the ropes alone.

“I really need your hands on me right now.” Kylo is almost pleading, _good_ , Hux likes to hear that before Kylo actually gets what he wants. Hux smiles, he likes teasing Kylo for a good while, until he is almost aching to have Hux inside him.

Hux runs his hands over Kylo’s chest, down to his stomach and around to the small of his back, while slowly leaning closer to Kylo’s body. Placing his lips lightly on Kylo’s neck he feels his breath shudder, and Hux smiles slightly into his warm skin. He runs his lips down Kylo’s neck, and bites him hard in the crook of his neck, hearing Kylo gasp again. Hux laughs now, seeing Kylo straining on the ropes, wanting to get free so he can make Hux give him what he wants. But he won’t, Hux is in charge in here, and he knows it well.

Kylo is breathing hard, mouth slightly open. Hux touches his lips lightly on the edge of Kylo’s mouth, and licks his lips. Kylo tries to kiss him, but Hux pulls back smiling, not smiling less when he hears Kylo sound an annoyed growl. “You really do enjoy torturing me like this don’t you?” Kylo says behind gritted teeth, followed by a short laugh, because he does in fact not entirely hate it himself.

When Hux suddenly puts his hand tightly on Kylo’s cock it’s like music to his ears when he can’t hold back an incredibly loud moan. Good thing the room is soundproof.

It’s getting harder for Hux to contain his own breath now, just the feel of Kylo against his own naked skin sending ripples through his body. He leans closer to Kylo again, closing as much space between them as possible, kissing and biting on his neck as he stretches up to untie Kylo’s hands. Sometimes not having Kylo’s hands on him feels unbearable, and this is one of those times.

 _Finally._ As soon as Kylo feels he is free, he grabs a hold of Hux and pushes him to his back, placing himself on top of him. Hux just smirks up at him “Happy now?”. Kylo answers by riding his hands all over Hux, and kissing him from the chest all the way down to his bellybutton. Hux is just as hard as he is, and Kylo quickly reaches for the lube stored in the nightstand.

 “You do know you won’t get to be on top, right?” Hux laughs and takes a handful of Kylo’s hair in his hand, pulling him off him and taking back the control. “Now, stay” he says when Kylo is pinned down on his back. Finished with the lube, Hux lifts Kylo’s legs to get full access to that well shaped ass of his. Hux likes it when their facing like this, likes to be able to look at that stupid face of Kylo’s, likes seeing the pleasure expressed in his face.

He enters Kylo as slowly as he is able to, hears him gasping, and is unable to keep in a moan himself. “Fuck”, Kylo arches his back in pleasure as Hux moves, trying not to go too fast, trying to make it last as long as possible. He bites at Kylo’s chest and feels his hands going into his hair, tugging slightly. This makes Hux go faster, not able to hold himself back any longer, Kylo moaning in response, clawing at Hux’s back in pleasure. As usual they come at almost the exact same time, perfectly synchronized, though Hux expects Kylo does something through the Force to make this happen, not believing it would be possible otherwise, this kind of connection.

Hux falls onto Kylo’s chest with all his weight, both panting. Kylo wraps himself more fully around Hux’s body, breathing into his hair. “Hux?” Hux makes a sound in response, too sleepy to say anything. “When we’re together…it feels like all the broken pieces inside me are being knit back together” Hux makes a sound that sounds like a laugh, “sometimes you say such ridiculous things”. He pulls apart from Kylo, looking down on him, smiling, “but I quite love you for it”. He gives Kylo a quick kiss on the cheek before he pulls out, a silent gasp escaping Kylo’s mouth as he does.

Kylo stays on his back in the bed as Hux goes to clean himself up. _But I quite love you for it._ It rings in Kylo’s head, repeating over and over. He was never supposed to have these kinds of attachments, and never did before, thought this was just going to be something…casual? No. It never felt like it was nothing, he knew he wouldn’t want to turn back the moment they had that first kiss. No matter how annoyed they can get with each other, Kylo knows he can’t be without Hux now.

He gets up and follows Hux into the bathroom. He is standing in the shower, probably finished cleaning himself since he is just standing under the water, hands against the wall. Kylo steps right into the shower, and puts his arms around Hux from behind, hugging him tight, kissing his shoulder. “Don’t let go”, Hux says while turning his head to get a glance at Kylo, “Don’t ever let go”. Kylo laughs into Hux’s hair, “oh, I’m far too gone for that now”. Hux turns all the way then, takes a hold of Kylo and pushes him against the wall, smirking at him. “Good, that’s what I like to hear”, he says before kissing him hard, running his hands up Kylo’s back and grapping hold of his shoulders, Kylo moaning against his mouth. It’s one of Kylo’s favorite feelings, Hux’s mouth on his, feeling Hux’s tongue on his.

 

 

_Don’t ever let go._

 

_I never will._


End file.
